Riding Bitch

The daily musings of a writer.

Bah Humbug


I’m tired tonight. And sad. The news from Boston is just awful. I really don’t understand why anyone would target marathon runners for any reason. Or Boston, for that matter. Times like this I am either glued to the television or avoid it altogether. Tonight I’m avoiding it altogether. I can’t take more death and senseless killing. I’ve had enough.

I’m sad too because I’m tired. I got home with a tiny bit of energy that I was hoping to use to write but was quickly dissipated by a few business phone calls, feeding the puppy and making myself dinner. That’s all it takes to make me tired after a long day at work. I miss Vermont, when I had – or it felt like I had – all the time in the world. I definitely did not have work, puppy and business calls to distract me.

The good news is we have our two actors for the play I’m supposed to direct this summer. They’re both recognizable, acclaimed actors, not household names but you’ve definitely heard of, if not seen, their movies. We had been waiting for them to confirm their participation in the first table-read this upcoming Saturday and tonight, they finally confirmed. I guess that means I am directing them. I wish I could feel more excited about it at this moment but all I feel is exhaustion. And a sudden urge to lose 20 lbs.

There’s so much to do in the next few weeks/months. Besides prepare for this play I need to rewrite the script I just optioned (no small task), read several books, write the book proposal for my memoir, continue working on my pilot, continue training my puppy and work full-time. Oh, and blog. I’m just not sure it’s all possible. Something might have to give. Or I have to do one thing at a time. I’m always trying to do everything at once.

For now, I think I’ll go to sleep early and try to wake up early (fascinating, I know). Sorry to be such a downer tonight. Hopefully tomorrow will bring some clarity and pep in my step.

Author: nivaladiva

Freelance writer and independent filmmaker.

6 thoughts on “Bah Humbug

  1. Yeah, I just want whoever did it to just claim responsibility already so we can do something about it. I just wish the world wasn’t set up so that people thought that they ever needed to do something like this.

    Well, good luck with your endeavors, don’t let too much of the pain get to you.

  2. Keep on keeping on x

  3. Lots of naps will help. Also, (however boring), I sometimes make a list of ST/MT/LT (for short, medium and long-term) projects to help me figure out what to do right now and what can just bloody well wait. I admire your ambition (and share it), but burnout is the cost of that, at worst.

  4. congrats on your casting for the play! lots of stuff doin’ in your neck of the woods – i have had this happen to me since my friend passed away – i inherited a job to run and employees to be responsible for – on top of my whole other life. i have learned a valuable lesson – i am only human (yes, took me 48 years, but better late than never right?) and i can only do so much at one time. yes, stuff i am certain you already know. i also look at it this way – sure makes life interesting!

  5. Congratulations on your play! That is so exciting. Because I am very good at giving people advice that I don’t follow I will tell you. DO NOT TRY TO DO IT ALL AT ONCE. The job is an obvious, unless you recently won the lottery. After that try highest priority first. Don’t forget to eat and sleep as well. You sound like you need it. Have some fun in between. 🙂

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